Thirteen Things About Returning to College

1. The fresh-out-of-high-school freshman are so tiny! Much smaller than my peers were when I was eighteen.

2. 140 dollars for a book? Is it made of gold? $140 is actually nothing compared to what the nursing students are paying for their books or what the engineering students paid at the UofI.

3. What exactly am I going to major in? Since it’s a small community college I’m attending, I have four choices: associate of science, associate of arts, assosiate of applied science and associate of applied arts. But what to do after these next two years? Beats me!

4. If my English instructor asks me where I learned something one more time…

5. I remember math being a lot more difficult. Oh wait, it wasn’t, I just didn’t do my homework. Why didn’t I do my homework in high school and get this stuff out of the way?

6. 97% on my English placement exam? I missed a question? Show me! I want proof! (If any of you regularly read my blog you might be asking, “how did you score so well on your English placement exam?” The answer is simple, my blog does not affect my GPA.)

7. When DickBlick said that this 18″ x 24″ portfolio actually holds 18″ x 24″ paper, they were lying.

8. My classes and homework had better not interfere with Dancing with the Stars, Heroes and Lost, or I’m not going! I kid!

9. Can they teach me how to think inside of the box? This abstract thinking that no one but me understands is beginning to get frustrating.

10. I’m almost certain that the pre-Socratic philosophers must have had an early bid on the opium trade.

11. I can overcome my disrespect for authority and check my attitude. I will not be asked to leave.

12. My photography instructor attends Burning Man every year and says, “it’s cool!” a lot. This is going to be a fun class!

13. Dan must love me a lot to bust his tail like he does so that I can go to school full time. I shouldn’t be so hard on him when he leaves his dirty socks turned inside-out on the floor.

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