April 29th, 2007Putting the Theism in Atheism
Just in case you were starting to think I couldn’t poke fun at myself…
There was a Christian lady who lived next door to an atheist. Every day, when the lady prayed, the atheist guy could hear her. He thought to himself, “She sure is crazy, praying all the time like that. Doesn’t she know there isn’t a God?”
Many times while she was praying, he would go to her house and harass her, saying “Lady, why do you pray all the time? Don’t you know there is no God?” But she kept on praying.
One day, she ran out of groceries. As usual, she was praying to the Lord explaining her situation and thanking Him for what He was gonna do. As usual, the atheist heard her praying and thought to himself, “Humph! I’ll fix her.”
He went to the grocery store, bought a whole bunch of groceries, took them to her house, dropped them off on the front porch, rang the door bell and then hid in the bushes to see what she would do. When she opened the door and saw the groceries, she began to praise the Lord with all her heart, jumping, singing and shouting everywhere! The atheist then jumped out of the bushes and told her, “You ol’ crazy lady, God didn’t buy you those groceries, I bought those groceries!” At hearing this, she broke out and started running down the street, shouting and praising the Lord.
When he finally caught her, he asked what her problem was. She said, “I knew the Lord would provide me with some groceries, but I didn’t know he was gonna make the devil pay for them!”


April 30th, 2007 at 11:21 am
That’s funny! I’m going to send that to my mom who does rosaries all time for me because I haven’t been to church in years.
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April 30th, 2007 at 12:00 pm
OH wow. My mom doesnt believe in God. I just started going to church with my little family here and its wonderful we think. Each person has there own views. I wont preach. This was wonderful though.
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April 30th, 2007 at 6:42 pm
Very funny! Ya little nut!
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April 30th, 2007 at 8:02 pm
LOL… see even a fellow athiest thought that was funny!
I may steal it!
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May 1st, 2007 at 12:46 am
Littlepea, my mom was Missouri Synod Lutheran, so she was only mostly Catholic. I’m not entirely sure what “does rosaries” means though?
Tweetey, I hope you don’t blame your mama’s “issues” on her atheism. We’ve all got baggage, whether we’re Christian, Atheist, Buddhist or especially Scientologist (sorry, couldn’t resist that one).
Laurie, Why yes, I am a nut. A Macadamia. You must be a peanut!
Mark, steal away! I got a kick out of it! And I will always be the first person to take the mickey out of me.
Mon Apr 30, 11:19:00 PM 2007
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May 1st, 2007 at 9:43 am
Have you seen those necklace thingies? With beads and a crucifix? That’s called a rosary. Madonna used to wear them. Each bead represents a prayer, it takes about an hour.
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May 1st, 2007 at 10:58 am
Courtney You know what I dont. I am finding my own way now that I am adult and wished I would have done this years ago to be honest with you. But I do like the jokes. Life is to short to hold this against my mother for her not believing. Its her choice really not mine. I do have to admit I have never heard of the last thing on your list with your comment back though. Well anyway.
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May 1st, 2007 at 10:59 am
OH! :::smacks head::: Yeah, I know what a rosary is — does she make them? I thought you meant that there’s a specific prayer or practice WITH a rosary.
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