Howls of protest prompt Hillsboro dog park to restore flag hydrant.

I think I have to have the Cat Butts magnet set. Because I’m a little bit odd that way!

Everyone loves Cat Butts! For true cat lovers. 5 popular breeds with a bonus hair ball! Works great on the fridge, car, and other metal surfaces.

I was watching Penn & Teller’s Bullshit! again last night. Episode 7 focused on Feng Shui and bottled water. Imagine my surprise when the following landed in my inbox this morning.

Dihydrogen monoxide is colorless, odorless, tasteless, and kills uncounted
thousands of people every year. Most of these deaths are caused by accidental
inhalation of DHMO, but the dangers of dihydrogen monoxide do not end there.
Prolonged exposure to its solid form causes severe tissue damage.
Symptoms of DHMO ingestion can include excessive sweating and urination, and
possibly a bloated feeling, nausea, vomiting and body electrolyte imbalance.
For those who have become dependent, DHMO withdrawal means certain death.

Dihydrogen monoxide:

is also known as hydroxl acid, and is the major component of acid rain.
contributes to the “greenhouse effect.”
may cause severe burns.
contributes to the erosion of our natural landscape.
accelerates corrosion and rusting of many metals.
may cause electrical failures and decreased effectiveness of automobile brakes.
has been found in excised tumors of terminal cancer patients.

Contamination Is Reaching Epidemic Proportions!

Quantities of dihydrogen monoxide have been found in almost every stream,
lake, and reservoir in America today. But the pollution is global,
and the contaminant has even been found in Antarctic ice. DHMO has
caused millions of dollars of property damage in the US.

Despite the danger, dihydrogen monoxide is often used:

as an industrial solvent and coolant.
in nuclear power plants.
in the production of Styrofoam.
as a fire retardant.
in many forms of cruel animal research.
in the distribution of pesticides. Even after washing, produce remains
contaminated by this chemical.
as an additive in certain “junk-foods” and other food products.

Companies dump waste DHMO into rivers and the ocean, and nothing can be done
to stop them because this practice is still legal. The impact on wildlife is
extreme, and we cannot afford to ignore it any longer!

The American government has refused to ban the production, distribution,
or use of this damaging chemical due to its “importance to the economic
health of this nation.” In fact, the navy and other military
organizations are conducting experiments with DHMO, and designing
multi-billion dollar devices to control and utilize it during warfare situations.
Hundreds of military research facilities receive tons of it through a
highly sophisticated underground distribution network.
Many store large quantities for later use.

The Horror Must Be Stopped!

Act NOW to prevent further contamination. Find out more about this dangerous chemical.
What you don’t know can hurt you and others throughout the world.
Please visit DihydrogenMonoxide.org to see what you
can do to help!

[Note: By the way, if anyone feels the urge to send me one of those oh-so-politely phrased emails that never really are, explaining to me what DHMO really is -- Don't. My patience for condescension is wearing thin. However, if anyone actually falls for this I will laugh heartily at your expense. ]

Sorry for the cheesy title.

If I were an Alphons Mucha (pronounced: Mookh’ah) painting, I’d apparently look like this.

On their way to a justice of the peace to get married, a couple has a
fatal car accident. The couple is sitting outside heaven’s gate waiting
for St. Peter to admit them. While waiting, they wonder if they could
possibly get married in Heaven. St. Peter finally shows up and they ask
him.

St. Peter says, “I don’t know, this is the first time anyone has ever
asked. Let me go find out,” and he leaves.

The couple sits waiting for two months and begins to wonder if they
really should get married in Heaven, what with the eternal aspect of it
all. “What if it doesn’t work out?” they wondered. “Are we stuck
together forever?”

St. Peter finally returns after yet another month, looking somewhat
bedraggled. “Yes,” he informs the couple. “You can get married in
Heaven.”

“Great,” says the couple. “But what if things don’t work out? Could we
also get a divorce in Heaven?”

St. Peter, red-faced, slams his clipboard onto the ground.

“What’s wrong?” exclaims the frightened couple.

“Come on!” St. Peter exclaims. “It took me three months to find a priest
up here! Do you have ANY idea how long it’s going to take me to find a
LAWYER?”

Trust me, wait until the end!